New Star Trek Series Features Utopian Society Somehow Surviving Without Non-Binary Pronouns

U.S.—The internet has been abuzz with reactions to Star Trek: Picard, the year’s most hotly-anticipated spin-off of a spin-off.  Since the original series premiered in 1966, modern science has been unable to calculate the precise number of Star Trek spin-offs, though current estimates are almost as high as the 384 known genders. While spin-offs such as Star […]

US troops drink Iceland capital’s entire beer supply in one weekend

Thousands of U.S. soldiers depleted all of the beer in Iceland’s capital over the weekend. More than 6,000 soldiers were in Reykjavik for four days participating in the Trident Juncture 18 – a NATO-led military exercise. After their drills, the troops reportedly visited the city’s downtown bars, where they finished off the entire beer supply. According to Icelandinc magazine […]

Sex Addict Selling Tortillas Didn’t Realize She Was Using Dildo as Rolling Pin

A San Antonio, Texas woman just trying to make an honest couple of extra bucks by selling homemade tortillas has gone accidentally viral because she, apparently, is not up to date with the latest in dildo design. The woman, named Peggy, began selling her produce on Facebook Marketplace. To help illustrate that her tortillas were authentic and […]

Yellowstone Tourist Files Complaint About “Untrained” Grizzly Bears

A visitor in Yellowstone National Park filled out a Xanterra Parks and Resorts visitor comment sheet to complain that the bears in the park are not trained to appear for park visitors. What sort of world are we living in where people are not only self-entitled but so deeply disconnected from the natural world around […]

Wanted: This Guy, and ‘No, We Are Not Kidding’

A caricature out of California either shows the most confident thief ever, or a very stupid one. Police in Riverside are asking anyone who recognizes the caricature to reach out—”and no, we are not kidding”—after the man pictured robbed the artist of $500 in cash. The artist had just completed the image of the suspect at the […]

Man who bought ‘residential’ firehouse sued by Seattle – for using as residence

SEATTLE — The advertisement that grabbed Thom Kroon’s attention marketed a no-longer-used fire station as a “unique residential dwelling.” So Kroon purchased the property from the City of Seattle in a 2012 auction. Kroon told KIRO 7 he “thought we had essentially bought a residential property” for $712,000. The Seattle man then spent thousands of dollars […]

2020 Tokyo Olympics: Athletes Assured Cardboard Beds Won’t Collapse During Sex

Tokyo: International athletes are under pressure and harbour fears while performing not only on the field, but off it too. So it seems, if one were to go by assertions by the organisers of the 2020 Tokyo Olympics. Athletes who would participate in the Games have been assured that their cardboard beds won’t collapse during sex, […]

Taco Bell burglar in Georgia made food and napped, police say

One burglar may have been too full to make a quick getaway after he broke in and ate some late night snacks at Taco Bell. The Gwinnett County Police Department in Lawrenceville, Georgia shared photos and surveillance video of a suspect who broke into the fast food restaurant around 12:15 a.m. on Dec. 25, in […]

Man Calls Cops on Girlfriend For Being Too Rough During Sex

Just look at this mugshot. I love it. Does this really look like a person who could do damage? No, it doesn’t. But apparently, this evil evil woman did. So much so, that she was arrested. 24-year-old Kristan Parris was booked into the Davidson County jail after her boyfriend, Taylor Hayes, called police when she got too […]

Trapeze artist with diarrhea shits on 23 people

“The wonderful Belgian Circus has arrived, full of magic, illusion, laughter, show, fun, with tamers and our brave trapeze artists” was the presentation of the circus, this Friday, in Valencia (Spain). What was not expected by the audience, children, adults and old people, is that in the middle of the show, and when it was […]